beccaalloverx3's Journals on Buzznet

quick update

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-12-02T12:33:00Z

damn this was from bamboozle in may =) props to mandie for taking this awesome pic of these cuties. anyways those hot boys for those of you who don't know are the maine. i just saw them on the second to last show of the OP tour w/ a rocket to the moon, verseaemerge, cobrastar ship and boys like girls. sick show =) everyone was great and i cant wait until this summer when the new album comes out for the maine. so proud of these boys <3

im at college now. finally got the hell outta boarding school. not quite sure what i wanna do like major wise but im thinking something with music. any ideas?

well i gotta bounce and study for finals =)

more soon love becca all over x3

long time no update buzznet!

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-05-08T12:12:00Z

hey i've been way busy- just you know trying to get my diploma and get out of high school- june 6th can not come any slower for me. i've been working on projects for school, going home for the weekends, and seeing bands when i can =) the one weekend i stay on campus, all of my friends decided to go home so i'm stuck in conneticut for the weekend may as well make the most of it cuz after all i'm going to a benifit concert this weekend so might as well look forward to that plus there are what 5 weeks till graduation then summer =) i'm most likely working to earn money for college. Throw in warped tour and the SH.It Happens Tour and getting my iscence= amazing summer ahead of me

well i should get going i got work to do <3 becca

life.love.happiness

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-03-02T10:39:00Z

hey!
typin with one hand sucks so if there's a lot typos so very sorry.
anways im so pumped cuz i found this band
call call the cops on purevolume they are amazing! if you love all time low, you'll love them, so pretty please go check 'em out mmmmkay?
also my week is going well so far *knock on wood* cuz knowing me the next second i step outside- in a fucking blizarrd but thats besides the point- i'll trip/fall or doing something equally as stupid.
i'm also happy cuz:

i finally got this book from the library!!!!! woo
i'm gonna spend the rest of my free reading it and listening to music =)
you know you all love me haha
becca

worst week ever

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-02-27T13:27:00Z

hey!
sorry for the lack of updates. i've been super busy. i've been getting ready for the muiscal- a funny thing happned on the way to the forum- that my school is putting on fr like te past 3 months =) it's sooooooo much fun but it takes up a shitload of my free time. oh well i still enjoy it cuz i love music x3
anways to sum up my life, i've gotten into 5 colleges- 3 scholarships- and rejected from 1 college. i'm super excited =) i'm doing to do some interviews and tours over my break- which is super soon =)
i've had a rugged week =( like 2 of my friends decided to either go away for 2 yrs or get sent the wilderness =(
ontop of missing them like crazy, my dorm has a back porch and the school is suppose to make sure it's safe for us to go down in the winter cuz it gets hella slippery, but they never do =( so i'm rushing accross the porch when it's raining and snowing outside. i'm late for class-as usual O=). i fall down the steps- like all the way down to the ground and i'm like in the air thinking oh shit gotta brace for landing so i put my left hand on the ground and land awkwardly on my thumb. i'm sit on the steps i'm like oh great this adds to the best week ever.not. so i go to class thinking my thumb's fine. then i'm like checking myself over for brusises in english class and find my thumb black and blue. i'm like wtf so i play with it and it pops in and out of place. i'm like oh shit not good. so i rush out of class to the nurses. they look at it and are like oh your fine but you should se a dr anyways. the ace bandage it and tie a icepack to it- i have really dumb nurses at my school. so i'm like great this hurts like a bitch and they only gave me two advil. so after school i head over to the athletic trainer- he's smarter then the nurses- so i et there and he's like wtf is this? lookin at my bandage falling off with an ice pack. he re-wraps it. so i go to dress rehersal and sleeep.
today i go to the hospital to get x-rays. first of all i hate hospitals so the nurses had to bribe me to get there. so i'm like freaking out cuz that's how much i hate hospitals- i legit get panic attacks no joke. so i go see the dr. he sticks a needle into my thum to numb it and pops it back in. that was legit the weirdest/grossest experience of my life. so it's in place. he pokes my thumb . my thumb pops out of place. i'm like fuck now what? so he puts my thumb in a brace sends me back to hospital for more x-rays. then after that i go to the drs again. he's like well you tore lrigiments you may need a pin put in your thumb to hold it in place.
so all in all, i'm going to a hand specialist to see if i need surgery over my break. not looking forwward to that =(
hope your week rocked my sock!
love always and forever, becca

at least 11,000 people think i'm something i'm not, the courage to let them down isn't something i've still got =)

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-01-25T14:11:00Z

Hey all,
i'm in my dorm listnein to you me and everyone we know x3 i'm kinda recovering from so far the longest weekend i have ever had in my 1 1/2 yrs at boarding school. so friday night, oh boy where do i begin? i go
to our rival's school to watch two basketball game. of course we being forman win one and lose one. so i'm wit the boy and he's got a friend who goes to the school we're at. so his friend hangs wit us. immediatley people at my school start giving me shit and wanting to know who he is. so someone got on my nerves for the last time that night, i flip out at the kid and almost punch him for the 2nd time that night. my bf grabbed me before i did anything. thank god .
last night, my friend broke up wit her bf. it was bad. it got to the point where my bf had to tell him what he did wrong to make her break up wit him. i called him out. he didnt like it and proceeded to bitch me out via txt message. first of all if ya got a problem wit me, say it to my face. so i flipped out on him for that. my friend, bf and i went out for a party. of course the ex was there. he was sulking the whole time.
all and all hell of a weekend. i need another just to recover from drama.
x3 becca

random

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-01-20T09:52:00Z

RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it dozen’t make sense. NO CHEATING!
4. Tag 5 people.
5. Bold the questions and with the answers, give your own comments on how it relates to the questions.

1. How are you feeling today?
let's get it started- Black eyed peas

(oh wow so true)
2. Will you get far in life?

Sweetest Thing-U2

3. How do your friends see you?

Don't Lie- Black Eyed Peas

(so true )

4. Will you get married?

L.O.V.E.-Ashlee Simpson

(oh my god)

5. What is your best friend's theme song?
Back Breaker- Hit the Lights

6. What is the story of your life?

The Big Dollhouse- Hairspray

7. What was high school like?

Independent Women- Destiny's Child

(so true)

8. How can you get ahead in life?
Bluside-Rooney

9. What is the best thing about your friends?
Your Call-Seconhand Serenade

10. To describe your grandparents?
Niave-The Kooks
11. How is your life going?
Count It!-Hit the Lights

(awe=)
12. What song will they play at your funeral?
Landslide-The Dixie Chicks

(ironic-they played this at the last funeral i went to)

13. How does the world see you?
(Splash) Turn Twist- Jimmy Eat World

(true)

14. Will you have a happy life?
Dark Blue- Jack's Mannequin

15. What do your friends really think of you?
Greased Lightenin'- Grease

(hahaha)
16. Do people secretly lust after you?
Robert Says Goodbye- Enchanted

17. How can I make myself happy?

Thankful-Josh Groben

(True)

18. What should you do with your life?
Dear Maria, Count Me In- All time Low

(oh my god love how this song came up it's perfect for this question)
19. Will you ever have children?
Modern Day Ballad- Mandy K

20. What song would you strip to?
Come Together- The Beatles

(can't say i can picture myself stripping to this)

21. If a man in a van offered you candy, what would you do?
Teasing to Please- Cute is What We Aim For
(haha)
22. What does your mom think of you?
Always be My Baby- Mariah Carey

(so true she won't let me grow up)

23. What is your deep dark secret?
If I had Eyes-Jack Jonson

24. What is your mortal enemy's theme song?
It's Warmer in the Basement- Cobra Starship

(hell yeah!)
25. What's your personality like?
Finally-Fergie

26. Which song will be played at your wedding?
I Gotcha-Lupe Fisacso

(haha)
27. If you were to become the Dictator of a small Eastern-European nation, would you be a benevolent Dictator?
Hole- Kelly Clarkson

28. What are your aspirations?
The Way I am-Ingrid Michealson

29. What goes through your head when you wake up?
These Backs are Made for Stabbing-Hit The Lights

(yes!)

you say hello and i have to let you go x3

beccaalloverx3 — 2009-01-14T10:27:00Z

Hey there,
ik i haven't written here in awhile. i've been busy figuring out how to do work and keep a decent social life in track all the while trying not to punch haters in the face. but that's high school. drama= life for some people. i don't do that. i prefer to live my life- drama-free- to the fullest wit music by my side, the lunch table group and of course my bf wit me. anyways i've been meaning to post this for a couple of days. The title is the title of this entry. so read it:
I saw your picture. Your smile. Your muscular arms. All laid out on the page in front of me.
That smile said trust me,
It encouraged me to allow myslef to be intrigued by you.
You asked for my scn. I gave it to you without hesitation.
Only to find out that you'd talk wit me all night longs. Hours flew by like seconds and the hours turned into days of talking to you.
A few months later, we traded numbers.
Why? because I believed in the concept of you and me. together. Always and forever.
We laid in seperate beds. The phone glued to our ears as we talked for hours.
The phone would always ring early the next morning. I'd gradually would wake up to your voice.
I did this because I'd let myself fall for you.
But the concept of you and me, now looking back on all this, now seems so absurd.
Cuz you got that girl.
I have my boy.
We both moved on, each knowing one thing- there will never be anyone else like you.
So with that off my chest and onto paper, it's time for me to do something bold and new.
Baby, I need to let you go.

love, becca

she's 18 and a beauty queen she makes the boys feel weakx3

beccaalloverx3 — 2008-12-14T13:37:00Z

Hey lovers,
so i'm typing a thesis paper-sucks- and looking for power point cuz ontop of the paper we have to so a presentation. i'm listening to girls do what they want by the maine- hence the entry title. i stumbled accross something i wrote in september. sorry if it's long.
i'll call it Head to toe She's dressed to Kill
so read:
Let me tell you a story,
About a girl.
Her name was Jesey
She looked about 12.
Age-15.
The body type she had was short and skinny.
Style of clothes was a cute Limited-Too black dress shirt,
And a long skirt with pink and black stripes
On her feet she wore black dress shoes.
Her face was caked with make up and heavy lip-gloss on her lips.
Jesey was eager to begin her freshman year in high school.
She had her girls left over from middle school .
Her appearance was sweet and innocent with a summer tan and freckles on her nose.
Her mom took her picture and told her how pretty she was.
When it was time to leave, Jesey walked to the car and got dropped her off at school.
She got to the school door, took a deep breath, and walked in.
Tall and confident was the aura that she gave off when she walked through the door.
Deep inside she was scared of growing up.
Boys gave her the once over.
She beamed and blushed.
Of course she loved attention from anyone.
Who dosen't?
Lunchtime rolled around.
She sat with her girl group.
Jesey ran for vice president of the class,
And won against her friends.
Then the cute popular boys started paying attention to Jesey and her friends.
This girl had a good life until one particular lunch period.
Jesey walked up to the table.
Set her tray down .
Felt awkward and uncomfortable as her friends whispered and stared at her.
She took one look at one of her friends who had her hand cupped around a boy’s ear.
The boy laughed and passed the joke along to another friend.
The friend smirked and gave her a cold look.
Jesey stood frozen in place.
The friend said, “There’s no room here.”
The friend glared at the rest of the group.
The girls moved their purses and stretched out and mumbled in agreement.
The boys all looked at each other and raised their eyebrows.
Everyone stared. Anticipated what Jesey would to next.
The expression “All eye’s on me” popped into her head.
It seemed like something that would happen in a movie.
Only this was real life and they were all watching her.
They were expecting Jesey to fight her friend.
Instead she silently picked up her lunch and walked towards the doo.r
Jesey turned around blocking her face with her long hair.
A strategy she used to concel how she really felt about situations like these.
She peeked through her hair.
and glanced at her old table and heard laughter.
Her eyes were filled tears as she quickly headed towards the exit.
She was determined not to cry in front of everyone.
Not here. Not now. She kept repeating to herself to calm down.
Jesey made a beeline for the bathroom.
After quickly checking the stalls to make sure she was alone.
She chose one sat one the toilet and ate the lunch crying her eyes out.
Fast-forward a year later,
Jesey looked about 13 and was clumsy.
She confidently wore low cut Abercrombie shirts and long skirts.
So she would look like she was following the latest trends.
Maybe her so-called friends would beg to take her back, if she looked like them.
Boys stared down her shirt.
Every where in the school there were boys and girls making ou.t
She wanted a boyfriend.
Jesey became close to two girls.
She ran for vice president of the class and won again for the second year in a row.
Jesey felt popular and loved.
Until the girls dragged her to a dance,
Jesey walked in and felt uncomfortable but masked it with fake confidence.
She told these friends she wanted her first kiss.
They set her up with a guy.
He was drunk.
Jesey was niave to realize that he was drunk.
She kissed him and came home smelling like beer.
Her parents lectured her about alcohol.
Jesey felt really sad.
She changed her wardrobe to black shirts and baggy jeans.
She went to school and heard everyone talking about her.
Jesey went to her locker and opened it, grabbed her books.
She dropped her book and heard snickers.
Jesey whirled around and saw her one of her friends whispering into a guy’s ear.
Her friend caught her looking and rolled her eyes at the guy continued to gossip.
Jesey felt a tap on her shoulder.
She had been staring at her friend for so long that she didn’t even notice her other friend standing there until the girl spoke in a condescending tone, “Just ignore her Jesey. She is such a bitch. Aren’t you going to be in this class with me? Walk with me.”
Jesey nodded grabbed her book off the floor and slammed her locker shut and followed behind her.
She the realized she was late for class.
Her friend had a pass and handed it over to the teacher as she entered the room.
Jesey did not.
As Jesey followed her friend into the classroom, she noticed the teacher’s icy glare and the classmate’s curious stares.
She didn’t want to draw more attention to herself, so she muttered to the teacher, “I’m sorry for being late.”
She slide into the seat her friend had saved for her and felt her face turning red.
She cursed under her breath and decided not to learn anything in this class for the rest of the year.
Jesey was angry, scared and hurt.
She hid her feelings by convincing herself that she was fine.
This worked well until June rolled around, she began to realized that she needed help.
Jesey got the help she needed.
Her diagnosis was anxiety.
She took meds and care of herself.
She felt good for a while.
Then her dog got sick.
She was sad about that.
In August, Her family decided to go to Maine for vacation.
Jesey felt uneasy but assumed it was all anxiety.
After all it was summer and she needed a vacation.
She had a lot of fun,
Until her best friend’s dad got hit by a truck.
The driver was stoned.
And the dad was dead.
Jesey never felt so miserable in her entire life.
Oh well, she thought, “at least I still have my dog at home.”
Skip a couple of months. Stop when you get to Thanksgiving.
Her parents had to put her dog down.
Jesey couldn’t handle all this.
First she had anxiety.
Then her best friend’s dad died.
Last her dog had to die.
She never felt like this before.
She went to her room and cried herself to sleep night after night for almost a month straight.
By the time junior year came, Jesey wore only pink and brown.
She chose to concentrate on the guys not the schoolwork.
Her reason…School was bull and I won’t learn anything in this public school system.
16 wasn’t so sweet for Jesey.
Sure she had the party that everyone wanted to be invited to: limo to the city to have dinner and see a Broadway musical.
A month later, Jesey was up late doing homework as usual. Dreading school and the SATs.
She screamed that she hated school and wanted to leave it behind and start over.
Her parents dragged her on boarding school tours.
A year later,
She wound up getting accepted to a small school in Connecticut.
Jesey repeated her junior year.
Made some friends and learned that she was smart.
She found her friends.
She learned how to grow up and live through high school.

x3 becca

the concept of fashion is the one to blamex3

beccaalloverx3 — 2008-12-13T19:51:00Z

Dear loves,
I’m sitting here. No music is playing . My phone’s hiding in my backpack from the teachers. I’m sitting in the cafeteria on a Saturday night. My only free night of the week. Because some stupid teacher decided to blow some shit way out of proportion. I got in trouble for what being 18 years-old and in my boy’s room? Hell yeah. That’s what I did wrong. I’m sitting here alone. My boy had to leave because according to our punishment we have to spend detentions without serving them together. That’s right. Whenever my boy’s there, I have to leave and vice versa. The school is that strict. So here I am. Getting made fun of for getting caught. Story of my life. Thank God I’m used to getting picked on but that’s another story to tell whenever you get to know me. That’s if I let you in. So the teacher who caught us together decides to make things 10xs more difficult for us. There were others involved. Two innocent boys. She gave them hell too. They are sitting in the same room I am. One’s across from me. The other’s on the opposite side of the room. They didn’t do shit. Yet the teacher made sure to get them punished. But she made it worse for me and my boy. We aren’t allowed to go near any member of the opposite sex’s dorms for the rest of the year, social probation for the rest of the fucking term, and two detentions. Yeah I got one more after this. Not happy about it. I’m 18 and get treated like I’m fucking 14. I can take care of myself. Thanks. I don’t need the school to baby-sit for me. My boy would never rape me. That Ik for a fact. So the school shouldn’t need to worry about shit wit me. The only problem is as I sit here I feel somewhat guilty. As I here the other kids socialize and be happy, I get angry. Angry that I’m stuck here. Angry that the school is putting me through hell in ordered to be able to stay and graduate. But why do I feel guilty? I shouldn’t . I mean sure I broke a major rule. It’s written in the handbook: “Members of the opposite sex shall not enter each other’s dorm.” Maybe I feel guilty just cuz I got caught. I mean it’s not like I haven’t been in and out of his room a million times before we got caught. We just happened to get caught by the wrong person. The person who hates both of us and is using her power to hurt us even more then is possible. Ugh I’m here for two hours. It’s only 8:47. I got till 10. Fuck this. I want out more and more every second I sit here. It’s driving me crazy being punished. I want to cry. I want to scream and yell and try to get out of it. I want to open the window and jump out and run and never look back. You know that Mayday Parade song that says “So I will run until my feet don’t touch the ground.”? Well it describes me perfectly. I’m a girl who won’t sit still without putting up a fight. Replace Jesse in the beginning of the song wit Becca and that will explain me. I want out of school now. I want out of my life. I want to graduate and fly to the west coast where everything will be ok. I’ll have places to go every night. Bands to see. Boys to play wit. That will have to wait for now. Next year means college. 4 more years of school. Then after that I’ll go to LA. Be a manager or something for music cuz music is what I love .
X3 always a pissed of wishing she could play the devil wears prada so loud Becca

sunrise sunset all for you my diasyx3

beccaalloverx3 — 2008-12-13T12:31:00Z

hey lovers,
ik i just posted yesterday. but i was sitting here in my dorm as usual looking down at my toe just spacing out. w.e. listening to the jonas brothers-yeah i'm a huge fan. get over it =) i was thinking about the summer. I was riding my bike being a sketchy stalker. kidding about the stalker part. i rode it past the street where ik my boy of the moment was workign said hey to him. i went around the corner fast. i ride fast for a small gal. so my phone goes off im like all right let's see who this is. so i check to make sure there's no cars coming at me. there wasn't. now there's a bunch of cars parked to the side. there's a big ass one sticking out further then the rest. i'm like i got time. so i look down at the phone. i had my i-touch in my hand-prolly listening to atl like always. i run into the big car. i'm like fuck. i smashed my i-touch screen up. of course in the summer when you ride, you where flip flops. that's just what you do unless you're a tourist. so my big toe drags along the pavement. of course i wear a helmet unlike other teens i ride safe=) so i'm on the ground like wtf so i get up grab my bike which go bent up and cracked. i look down i'm like fuck there's blood. yeah tonenail fell off. yummy. so i walk back show my toe to the boy he goes wtf i can't handle this. he dose not like blood. i found out that day. of course he never told me. he grabbs anothe cop i'm like this is fantastic i work on the beach everyone knows me in this lil' town in jersey. the police man goes wtf you need first aid i'm like fuck my parents are gonna kill me. so i calll them. ambulence picks me up. i meet another guy- cody. turns out one of my good friends at the beach knows him. small world huh?
x3always becca